Ik vermoed dat veel van jullie het internationale forum niet bezoeken, en daarom plak ik het hier neer.
I'm an American girl who's closely befriended a Saudi Muslim male... I've been a close witness to his struggles back and forth with his religion, which have been compounded by the fact that he's the oldest and his father recently died. I've figured out that the best way to reach him is by showing Christ's unconditional love through me as best as I can (I'm a Christian) rather than arguing with him over every single difference in our religions, which can be exhausting as he doesn't find it valuable to read the Bible. He did read it once and found in Genesis where God blessed Ishmael and his 12 descedants, which my friend took to mean the 12 imams. This seemed to confirm his Shia belief in that the Bible, in one vague case, supported Shias. I don't know if he's read anything since. However, this isn't why I'm writing.
He's very intelligent and gifted, and I feel burdened for him daily to see him wasting his life in an oppressive religion and society, which you know of better than me.
As a former Muslim, I'm wondering if there's any particular advice you may be able to give me in order to help him free himself from this religion. He tells me constantly that he just wants to know the truth, and if that leads him away from Islam, he'll leave it. As I'm studying counseling in college, I'm well aware of what 'phase' he's in - he's left the ignorant phase (in which nothing has challenged his viewpoint or way of thinking), he's also left the admiration of the 'other' culture (US), and is back into supporting his own faith and culture. The last stage is to come to terms with both cultures - and in his case, his religion in general - but that can only come from searching and being presented with the facts. He's read the Qu'ran since he was a child, and still reads it today, so there's nothing left to 'shock' him, so to speak. I know that when we learn and experience things as children, when we grow up, they often lose their appalling and horrific nature, unless we actually take the time to think about them carefully. So, I'm asking for any advice you may have.
Additionally, I want to commend you for the advice you've given others who have asked you for help in converting to other faiths. You've kept an open stance, and additionally haven't discouraged people from converting to Christianity. I am your absolute supporter and fan.
And by the way, as a little aside - for my TESOL (teaching english to speakers of other languages) teaching course (I'll complete my MA in TESOL in May), I read an article about Islamophobia for one of my assignments (I'd chosen the article). I'd begun reading the qu'ran right about that time and had begun an biography of Muhammed, and I was/ am teaching ESL to many Muslims, so I've had some exposure. Needless to say, my reaction to the article was dubious and skeptical, as I pointed out many of the atrocities muslim countries do to non-believers in their countries are much more horrific compared to some Muslims in England feeling bad if people ask them why they think plural wives is ok!! My professor came down hard on me and said he didn't like the way i talked about Islam, and wanted to see me in his office (he's British). I was hoping to use him for a reference for entry into the counseling MA, so I backpedaled a little just to save my grade and my reference.... but as my Muslim friend has pointed out - America isn't a truly 'free' country, especially in the academic world... isn't that the truth. No society is truly perfect. And I did save my grade and my reference without really recanting what I'd said (I'm good at BS, fortunately).
Anyway I just wanted to say to keep up the good work - I've cried a lot over many of the stories I've read in your website, and I pray fervently that they find the Truth, no matter what that may be.
Antwoord van Ali.
Dear Katy: (I changed your name just in case you did not want your real name published)
Be warned my dear! This man you are talking about is not the right man for you. He is not on his way to enlightenment and awakening. The back and forth you are talking about is typical. Muslim youths at times rebel and even engage in activities that are considered unIslamic, like drinking, partying and having sex out of marriage. However, they are always filled with guilt and think what they do is evil. They may even call themselves unbelievers and atheists for a while. Sometimes they tell you that they do not care about religion and that all religions have something good to offer and something bad. Don’t’ be fooled by any of that. They all will go back to Islam and they know it. At the back of their minds they think Islam is true.
This Saudi friend of yours is bad news. Is a Shiite? I did not know there are many Shiites in Saudi Arabia. Anyway, he has not read the Bible. Muslims do not read the Bible or the books of any other religion. In fact Bible is a banned book in SA and if you are caught with a few copies, they accuse you of trying to proselytize Christianity and you could face jail time, whipping and even execution. What this man has read is what the Muslim Mullahs have written claiming that Muhammad has been foretold in the Bible. He knows only those parts and nothing else. Of course those claims are all bogus and false claims.
This man has come to America, at first fascinated by its glamour and freedom. Now that he has had his go with that, he feels nostalgic about his childhood indoctrination, has started to read the Quran, finds fault with America and is becoming a hardened Muslim. What else is new? This is the rout all terrorists take. How can a person who reads the Quran and understand and still believe in it be a good person? My grandmother used to read the Quran every day, but she did not understand a word of it and she was a good woman. Had she known what is in that book she would not have remained a Muslim. Would you trust a man who reads Mein Kamph every day and will you try to sacrifice your own future for helping him?
One of the worst terrorist attacks in Iraq took place on Feb. 28, 2004 by a man who loved America. Ra’ed al-Banna was born in Jordan in 1973 to a wealthy merchant family. He was a lawyer in his country. In 2001, sometime before 9/11, al-Banna moved to the United States, where he lived in California for nearly two years. He seemed to fit in well, growing his hair long, and taking up American popular music. In one photograph that he sent to his family, he is seen standing in front of a military helicopter while holding an American flag. He even planned to marry a Christian woman until her parents demanded that the wedding take place in a church.
Al-Banna loved America; he told his family back in Jordan about the honesty and kindness of Americans. “They respect anybody who is sincere,” he told his father. Talal, a young man engaged to one of Ra’ed’s sisters, explained how Ra’ed, “loved life in America, compared to Arab countries. He wanted to stay there.” His father, Mansour, recounted that, despite the September 11 attacks, Ra’ed “faced no problems with his American workmates, who liked him.”
Al-Banna visited home in 2003 but on his return to the United States he was denied entry and was accused of falsifying details on a visa application. He returned to Jordan and became withdrawn, holding up in a makeshift studio apartment, sleeping late, and displaying a new interest in religion. He began praying five times a day and listening to the Quran. In November 2004, he went on pilgrimage to Mecca.
On Feb. 28, 2005 Banna blew himself up at a health clinic in Al-Hilla, killing 132 people and injuring 120, the worst such attack of the 136 suicide bombings that had taken place since May 2003 in that country. On March 3, the family received a call informing them of Ra’ed’s fate. “Congratulations, your brother has fallen a martyr.”
What made this easygoing, modernized, educated young man go from loving America to become a terrorist? The answer is one word: Islam.
Everyone has bad moments. Everyone goes through crisis in life and in such trying moments, one often seeks comfort in religion. However, when a young Muslim goes through a life crisis and seeks comfort in his religion, he is likely to become a terrorist.
The father noted that Ra’ed wore Western-style clothing, rarely went to mosque, and was ignorant of the names of local sheikhs. “I am shocked by all of this because my son was a very quiet man, not very religious and more interested in pursuing his law profession and building a future for himself,” he said.
What happened to this man? Scott Macleod of Time Magazine explains:
Ra’ed apparently led a double life, professing affection for America while secretly preparing to join the holy war against the U.S. in Iraq.
Daniel Pipes wrote:
When it comes to Islamist terrorists, appearances often deceive. That Banna was said to “love life in America,” be “not very religious,” and be interested in “building a future for himself” obviously indicated nothing about his real thinking and purposes. The same pattern recurs in the biographies of many other jihadis.
Mr. Macleod and Dr. Pipes are both mistaken. Often the Westerners cannot understand the mind of Muslims and their diagnoses are wrong. Ra’ed was not living a double life. He was not a terrorist when he came to America. He became a terrorist when he became interested in Islam, began praying five times a day and started listening to the Quran. Muslims are not born terrorists. They become terrorists after they are indoctrinated in Islam. The problem with our experts, our governments and us is that we have not yet recognized the cause of terrorism and are unwilling to see the role that Islam plays in it.
Denying that Islam has anything to do with Islamic terrorism is like denying germs have anything to do with contagious diseases and claiming the patient who up until yesterday was healthy, was sick from the start and was feigning health.
This Saudi friend of yours is no different. He is just like Al Banna, Muhammad Atta and all other Muslims who come to America, are caught in an inner war between the freedoms that America offers, whom they interpret as “sinful” and their evil cult whom they think is divine and then they seek refuge in their faith and become a more fanatical Muslim than the day they came.
For your own sake, leave this man and do not try to be Mother Teresa to him. You can’t save him because he does not look up at you. He looks down at you and therefore there is nothing you can do to help him. Leave him today. Do not respond to his calls and do not explain anything. If he insists only tell him you decided not to date a Muslim man after you learned the truth about Islam and its founder. Send him to FFI to find the truth on his own. You stay away from him.
Let me make this very clear to you. There are no happy endings in marrying a Muslim man. If a non-Muslim decides to marry a Muslim woman and if she agrees to, (because she really should not, according to her religion,) it is not that bad. A Muslim woman can be stupid and behave silly, but she can’t beat her husband or be abusive. However it is dangerous for non-Muslim women to marry Muslim men.
Please join our forum and talk to other women who made this mistake and regretted. They will all tell you that the monster they married to was at first loving, charming, attentive and cute. That all changed once they married and particularly once they had their first child.
So this Saudi friend of yours is intelligent! So what? Was Hitler stupid?
You think by showering him with your love he will eventually see the Christian love and will change. How naïf are you my dear? You have no idea how the mind of a narcissist works. Muslims are narcissists by their faith. They interpret kindness as weakness. If you are good to them, they think their strategy is working and feel victorious. This only validates their conviction.
I don’t know how clearer can I say this so the western girls can understand it. DO NOT BEFRIEND MUSLIM MEN. Just do not talk to them. Do not look at them. They are not for you. Muslim men are screwed in their heads. Unless they leave Islam on their own you should avoid them. Why I say they should leave it on their own? It is because they are manipulative and game players and they pretend to have left Islam to fool you and make you fall in their trap. Only if they leave Islam on their own and you see them actively taking against this cult and promoting anti Islamism you can trust them. Ask them what they think of the Jews and America. If they criticize them, you know they are lying and are sill full of Islamic hate . Only if you see them love America and Israel you know Islam is out of their system.
Now there are also some who allegedly leave Islam to embrace other ideologies of hate such as communism. Don’t be fooled. Communists, actually all the leftist, are no different. They are just as stupid and evil as the Muslims and often Muslims find in these hateful groups a good place to hide. Interestingly most of the fools converting to Islam also come from the leftists. So they will tell you that they do not believe in any religion and then go on defending the terrorists because America and the Zionists have left them no choice. Your professor belongs to this category. The leftist and the Muslims are two sides of the same coin. The coin is hate America, Heleno-Christianity and Israel.
Things are changing. Truth is getting out and people are awakening. Many leftists, just like many Muslims, are not evil. They have been simply fooled. Both these groups are seeing the truth and are waking up too. The antidote to ignorance is knowledge. Promote FFI and eventually we will get rid of ignorance.
Anyway, don’t try to be Florence Nightingale to a Muslim man. Be good to yourself and to your future children and find a nice man who is not infected by the virus of Islam.
Let me be frank with you. Even if you find an ex-Muslim man, this does not mean your happiness is guaranteed. You have to keep in mind that we come from screwed up societies and most of the time from dysfunctional families. Dysfunctional families exist everywhere but they are more prevalent in Islamic countries. However, an ex-Muslim man is often aware of the damage that he has received through faulty indoctrination and he is hopefully making an effort to overcome all those years of psychological abuse. However a man who thinks that the pedophile Muhammad was a prophet is beyond help. Muhammad said women are deficient in intelligence and if they disobey you beat them. You don’t need to take a man who thinks these asinine teachings are divine in your life. You can bet that he thinks you are deficient in intelligence and once you are under his control, he will start insulting you, belittling you for being a Christian, you will try to please him more by converting to Islam. You will wear the veil to show you are a good Muslima. None of that will make any difference. You remain a white whore in his sight. After having a few children, you escape from his yoke and this time he will marry a Muslim woman from his village to build a real Islamic family.
Read this story: http://www.faithfreedom.org/forum/viewtopic.php?t=37874
Also talk to Aunt Latifa. She is one of the very few lucky western women whose Muslim husband is actually a good man and does not beat her. However, she will tell you that marrying a Muslim is no picnic.
If you listen to my advice, you will probably forget me and will live a happy life. If you don’t you will remember what I wrote to you and will kick yourself for the rest of your life.
Wish you all the best.